Life is like a box of chocolate… a common line used to describe the ups and downs of life as a whole, it’s also beautiful, ugly, easy, yet hard but more importantly relative. By relative, I mean relative to what we have and not necessarily in monetary terms but more so things which are difficult to buy like love, family, friends, and fun memories. This is a lesson I learnt recently and life, in my opinion, is all about lessons, but some can only be learnt wearing different shoes.
So on January the 15th 2020 (which seems like a whole different year to be fair), I decided to achieve one of my main goals, to live in a foreign country where I didn’t understand the language, culture, way of life and had to kind of well… learn again to put it simply.
I decided to live in South America, Colombia to be precise having only visited once last year prior to moving. Initially, I planned for a 3 month stay which turned into 6 months and during my time living and interacting I learned some lessons that will stay with me for a lifetime.
1. How to make friends
A good friend of mine used the line “friends are invaluable” and I totally agree, a friend is someone you just can’t put a price on. Now, there’s no perfect recipe to make a friend but being yourself is the best thing one can do, as trying to be something you’re not will only lead to disappointment.
Before living in Colombia I had no prior connections or friends there at all so one of the lessons I learned early on was how to actually make friends somewhere new. In the photo below one of my friends Maria (not her real name lol) had a rooftop dinner and invited people over and it’s almost impossible to think back when I arrived at the airport I’d end up meeting and knowing so many interesting people during my time there.
Dinner with friends
2. What’s truly important
As a guy from London “one of the mandem” you can say, growing up in the inner city the things I was taught that were important tended to be materialistic in nature like money, cars, houses, at times relations with the opposite sex the list goes on. However, taking the leap to live in Colombia where the average salary is under $300 a month then what’s truly important whilst keeping money in the equation bears a different meaning.
Probably one of the most important things I learnt was the truth behind the phrase.
“The best things in life are free”
Things such as family, loved ones, smiling, dancing, singing, breathing all don’t cost a dime yet mean so much. Having spent almost 4-5 of my 6 months in lockdown and only being allowed to leave the house once a week at one point (yep! once a week). The true value of things became clearer day by day.
Gino Alberto our dog – He’s an angel
3. How to learn a new language and communicate
Communication is everything and living in a country where you don’t speak the language is no easy task. I had to learn how to fit in. Of course, if I chose to live in the US for example speaking English wouldn’t be anywhere near as difficult as trying to ask an American for directions to the toilet or a glass of “war-ta” (water in an English accent).
However, in my case learning the local language (Spanish) was crucial for my survival and building connections as hardly anyone spoke English but more significantly I had to learn what everyone around me was saying and quick.
I could possibly write a whole article on how I learnt Spanish in less than 6 months as there’s plenty to talk about but the key point here I’d like to highlight was the ability to actually learn a language and be able to well… communicate no matter your age or skill which is something I will have for life.
4. How different yet the same the world truly is
The world is small yet so vast, unfortunately most people don’t get to explore it as much as they’d like to as they are indulged in their day to day activities or just don’t have the time or money. Every country has it’s own uniqueness and I believe there is no answer to which country is the best as the world truly has something different to offer in each one.
In the case of Colombia, the biodiversity is absolutely stunning and it’s reflective even in city life where architecture is carefully built around trees and not just chopped down to create more space.
Despite the differences, the world is pretty much the same no matter where you go in terms of what people want and how people live. No matter where you go, people want to live a good life, eat good food, feel safe and well… just be happy. Kids in Rwanda love to dance just as much as kids in Indonisia. Living abroad opened my eyes further to appreciate the similarities we have but also recognize the differences.
5. The Love Language of Food
Food is the fuel which keeps us going, it varies all across the world and as I learnt is a type of love language. Sharing food with someone is a way to say you care about them and in South America food is a key part of life.
I would be invited to dinners, lunches and ad-hoc meals with friends and families to bond with them more while breaking bread… or in the case of Colombia while breaking Arepas… Colombians love Arepas.
Sharing food with someone is a way of saying I care about you
I now take more time to organize food gatherings with friends and family and it has helped a lot in creating memories and laughing moments. The photo below is the last meal I had in Bogota (Capital of Colombia) before heading back to Europe with the family I was staying with who made a typical Colombian dish for me as a sign of their love.
Ajiaco with a family
6. Make more time to have fun
Another lesson I learnt was just how important it is to have more fun in your life and shake a leg every once in a while (means dance/have fun). Life at times can seem to bog you down with tasks but taking the time out to just have some fun while living life is something I thought I was doing but clearly not enough.
Disclaimer: You haven’t had a party until you’ve had it with Latinos they can go on forever.
By having fun it doesn’t even necessarily have to involve food and drinks (though have either of those and I’m there in a flash) but it can pretty much be anything which you deem as fun.
I’ve started to take more time out to treat myself and have fun with my life whether that’s going out more, catching up with friends, taking mini trips whatever just to make me smile.
7. The true cost of a dollar
How much does a dollar really cost? A lot, not much, nothing at all perhaps? One of the earliest lessons I learnt was the answer to precisely this question. Now a dollar might not sound like much but it depends where we are talking about, as a dollar in the US can probably get you a candy bar but a dollar in East Asia can get a whole meal!
Nearly half of the world live on under $5.50 a day and I quickly learnt that you don’t actually need much to survive and live pretty well. The cost of living in Colombia is about 4 times cheaper than the UK and 3 times than the US and seeing first hand just how far a dollar goes really puts into perspective how much money governments and even people at times waste when people in other countries could do live changing things with that amount.
Lunch for around $2.50
Conclusion
All in all with the various lessons I learnt I probably might not have gained the knowledge about them just carrying on with life in London who knows? Though, living abroad allowed me to change viewpoints and get a feel for the bigger picture and therefore have a deeper understanding.
Finally, to touch on lesson no.1 “making friends one”, I honestly can not express how important this is and how it can make or break an experience. I know it can be difficult at times and even seem unfathomable but the basic principle to make a friend, you have to be a friend… and I am so glad I got to make some amazing friends.
